The misadventures of ordering coffee in Paris/Europe - Honeymoon Chronicals

Before our honeymoon I was very excited to do many things a la European style. Probably the top thing on my list was to drink my weight in coffee in France.

So the first day in Paris we got off the plane exhausted and a little dragged down from the Ambien (a travel must). We received our luggage immediately after getting into the baggage claim. We exchanged what was in my opinion too much cash, (travel with just a few hundred dollars) exchange rates are much more favorable if you withdraw from banks! So with money in our pockets and luggage in our hands we hailed a cab thanks to my husbands recollection of high school French and we made our way from CDG to our hotel in Paris proper.

We checked into the Hotel Andrea Rivoli and left our luggage in the lobby until our room was ready. By the time all this happened it was around 11 am and I was in desperate need for a coffee and food and a walk through Paris streets. We walked around our area a bit and headed down a random street filled with cafes. We stopped at the first one and sat outside. One thing I adore about Paris is all the outdoor seating faces towards the street the entire city is built of people watching. So the waitress comes over and greets us in French, I don't speak French, Eric told her we would order and here is how our conversation went.

Me - I would like a cappuccino.
Her - We don't have cappuccino.
Me - Of course, that is Italian, how about a latte?
At this point both her and Eric give me a funny look, I am clueless because I NEED CAFFEINE!
Her - She says something in French, I am embarrassed and agree to whatever it is. 

After a few moments she brings out Eric's tea and my coffee with (I kid you not) whipped cream on top. This was not exactly what I had pictured for my first cup of Parisian coffee.  It became my goal of that night to spend a few moments on Google learning how to order a proper cup of coffee in French. Some of you might be wondering what about Eric and his high school French well unfortunately Eric is completely hopeless in all matters relating to coffee. He doesn't drink it at all, one might think there is something wrong with him because of that fact, I know I have thought it on multiple occasions especially when we wake up for early morning surf sessions or anything in the morning really. So that night I hit up Google and for those of you who don't know here is a quick tutorial on order coffee in France.

• Café (kuh-fay) is plain coffee with nothing added, but is strong as it is brewed like espresso.
• Café au lait (kuh-fay oh-lay) is a popular French coffee style that has been popularized in America, as it's served in tres francais New Orleans at Café du Monde. In France, this is simply coffee with steamed milk, and it's almost always wonderful. You will sometimes get the coffee served in one pot or in the cup, and then a pitcher of steamed milk to pour in as you please.
• Café crème (kuh-fay khremm) is, as it sounds, coffee served in a large cup with hot cream.
• Café Décafféiné (kuh-fay day-kah-fay-uhn-ay) is decaffeinated coffee. You will still need to tell them you want milk (lait) or cream (crème) with your coffee.
• Café Noisette (kuh-fay nwah-zett) is espresso with a dash of cream in it. It is called "noisette," French for hazelnut, because of the rich, dark color of the coffee.
• Café Americain (kuh-fay uh-meyhr-uh-kan) is filtered coffee, similar to traditional American coffee.
• Café Léger (kuh-fay lay-zjay) is espresso with double the water.

Incidentally Café au lait was my coffee of choice for our time in France and by the second day I had that order down.